Their Wish

Today’s a day for lay-aways,
For storewide deals, no money down.
But unbecoming trade betrays
Our fallen’s day of earned renown.

Wall Street's Dislike Button

I delegate to broker Charles
All choices for securities.
No need to manufacture quarrels
About what I deem mysteries,
Including Facebook’s IPO.
About which this I’d like to know:

Nanoseconds of Civility

He rushed into a burning house
To save a neighbor close death.
Before his firemen could douse,
Mayor Booker feared his final breath
Would come inside a flaming room,
His generosity his doom.

Only in New York

Khalid Shaikh Mohammed scares me
Not for razing our Twin Towers.
Nevermore the bastard goes free,
Locked up till his final hours
In Guantánamo? Or elsewhere?
Does it matter? Finally, I care.

Marriage Bans

Same-sex marriage? Don’t be jocund,
Who’s the wife and who’s the husband?
Marriage of the different sexes?
More it lasts, the more it vexes.
Half end up in front of judges,
Drained of love and full of grudges.

You Tell Her, Bill

I disagree with John McCain
 On most stuff, though I like him heaps.
 I love his nearly lone campaign
 That gives my liberal friends the creeps
 To rid the Syrians of their fright
 By lending military might.

It's the Truth, Stupid

Among us who cannot forget
Our rowdy pranks from years ago?
The answer’s nearly all, I bet,
Although we’d just as soon forgo
Reminders of what brats we were,
And leave such larks at most a blur.

Cyber Grads

If tony universities
Rejected you and still you smart,
Some campus news the pain might ease
And give your hopes an odd fresh start:
You’re good to go to M.I.T.
As well as Harvard, all for free.

Where There's Bud There's Death

Our native tribesmen can’t hold booze
As try we do (though far from all).
Metabolism they don’t choose—
Absorbing poorly alcohol—
Their Asian forebears brought as trait
Across an ice-jammed Bering Strait.

A Matter of Habit

They heal the sick, they've taught the kids
Like (my fault, Sister, such as) I.
(Good syntax, we know—ow!—forbids,
Unless—OW!!—where, when, how, or why
Like—preposition—indicates.
Plus—ARGGH!!!-—I should have written me
As teach, verb transitive, dictates.
Now won’t you let your straightedge be?)