Who Would Have Known?

Let’s pull our troops from both the Stans

No later than tomorrow noon.

My trust’s as swift as any man’s,

But now I’m quicker to impugn

Islamabad. That huge abode—

Bin Laden’s—loomed just down the road.

A Taste of Tastelessness

Michele Bachman, White House would-be,
Likens Auschwitz to our tax codes.
What, she asked her mother, did she
Do to stop the one-way trainloads?

The Westminster Show

Who anywhere around the world
Could find the backbone to resist,
Amid those Union Jacks unfurled,
Except an anti-monarchist
Who’d favor humdrum, God forbid.
(More when such fanfare’s on his quid.)

Time to Gas Down

Whenever are we going to learn
The price of gas will just increase?
Why should we be Big Oil’s concern?
The driving public’s its to fleece.
Five bucks a gallon’s drawing near;
Yet tax breaks worth billions every year.

A True Choice

If a certain Galilean preacher,
Held by some as God, by some a prophet,
Walked the Earth again, once more a teacher,
This, I hope, is what he’d want to posit:

A Few Good Bullies

Recall the Rutgers freshman who,
While cozy with another guy
Was caught on tape and bid adieu
Not just to school. He chose to die.
But not before A Facebook post,
For—“sorry”—giving up the ghost.