Justice To Be Denied?

Hello, is Ginni Thomas there?
It’s you? Tim Hutchens on the line.
I know full well it isn’t fair
To call on weekends before nine.
But all the night I couldn’t sleep
And figured you were wide awake.
You’d left a message at the beep
Just shortly following daybreak
One Saturday to try and get
Anita Hill’s delayed regret.

California Toking

Like, many of us waited all our life,
To smoke a joint at Market Street and Pine,
What cops will do, the speculation’s rife.
Like, man—you got some brownies?—it’s divine!

Welcome Smoke and Mirrors

The Congress’s debate about
If global warming’s natural
Or manmade (which I hardly doubt),
Is ending. Holy mackerel!
You’d think as glaciers disappear
We’d have the Hill’s collective ear.

We Don't Get No Respect

Christine O’Donnell, Delaware’s
Tea Party Senate candidate,
Is just like us’ins, she declares,
She wouldn’t think to masturbate.

Time to Speak Up

Don’t-Ask-Don’t-Tell as policy
Is playing dumb and dangerously.
In NATO, only Turkey buys
Our idiotic compromise,
Which 14,000 troops has trapped
When, of their preference, someone yapped.

Rescate!

Chile’s Atacama Desert,
Barren land but full of menace.
Miners there in much discomfort,
Waiting months to reach the surface.

Peril, though, came not from rescues
In a claustrophobic capsule.
When it made its topside breakthroughs,
There, perchance, began a hassle.

Kim Jong Un (or Could it be Eins?)

Remember where you read it first:
Though North Korea seems accursed
For flinging missiles, testing nukes,
Dear Kim Jong Il, chief kook of kooks,
To rule the land (thank goodness soon)
Has named as heir, son Kim Jong Un,
Who went to school in Switzerland.
Of deutch, français he got command;
With U.S. kids he used to hang.
He’ll—get this—liberate Pyongyang!

When Ignorance is Folly

We want to help the Mexicans
Attempt to curb their drug cartels,
Among whose rank shenanigans,
Are whacking mayors and cops, which smells
As bad as wasting journalists
When coverage of the hell persists.