Christine O’Donnell, Delaware’s
Tea Party Senate candidate,
Is just like us’ins, she declares,
She wouldn’t think to masturbate.
We don’t pay phone bills, you and me,
And so our service gets cut off.
We go for years with no degree.
Tuition overdue? Cough cough.
We’ve stiffed the mortgage company,
And thus no longer own a house.
Nor can we still a borrower be
Élan our credit ratings douse.
By chance if we are hiding Jews,
And Hitler knocks and wants to know.
A lie is not for us to choose,
We’ll trust in God’s quick help below.
We’ll also have to take on faith
That evolution is a myth,
A viewpoint that the eggheads scathe.
Why can’t we see it work forthwith?
They say there was a long delay
Before some apes became like us,
And that we share our DNA
With insects? Let’s get serious!
If we’re to retake Washington
And reshape Earth in our own mold,
A point we’ll have to hammer on:
Six thousand years is all it’s old.
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