Kim Jong Un (or Could it be Eins?)

Remember where you read it first:
Though North Korea seems accursed
For flinging missiles, testing nukes,
Dear Kim Jong Il, chief kook of kooks,
To rule the land (thank goodness soon)
Has named as heir, son Kim Jong Un,
Who went to school in Switzerland.
Of deutch, français he got command;
With U.S. kids he used to hang.
He’ll—get this—liberate Pyongyang!

He also liked to guzzle beer,
And Michael Jordan made him cheer.
Jean-Claude Van Damme he loved to see,
And just as much he loved to ski.
So what are chances he’ll unroll
A million-member ski patrol
From decommissioned Army ranks
And snowmobiles from salvaged tanks?
Instead of lonely, unlit streets,
Cafés, bäckereien, selling sweets.
Let’s hope the generals sing his praise,
And somehow number daddy’s days.