Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Insanity's Nadir

The N.R.A.’s Wayne LaPierre
In lecturing the nation’s press
On how the country must  beware
Of classroom kills that leave a mess
From kids whose lives had just begun,
Proposed a good guy with a gun.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Now or Never

Just maybe as a nation we
This time can see the slain as prey
And not, as kooks would have them be,
Fit martyrs for the N.R.A.
To propagate a greater cause
For ever looser weapons laws.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Here Come the Brides, and Grooms

In some states fifty years ago
If whites wed blacks, they broke the law.
Today in thirty-one, Jim Crow
Might tip his hat at what he saw:
Gay couples who can’t tie the knot.
Why? Legislators’ tommyrot!

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Yes, to a Two-State Solution

More so than ever, Palestine
Deserves acceptance as a state.
Its moderates are in decline,
And Gaza’s shambles elevate
The Strip’s Hamas regime from hell.
Whose goal’s the death of Israel.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Unholiest of Wars

I’ve never had much confidence
In second-guessing Israel,
For sure in matters of defense
When neighbors’ hate turns visceral.
Each time they’ve foolishly attacked
They’ve got their Muslim fannies whacked

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Underexposed

It’s more than just some juicy poop
About who knew what dirt and when.
It’s why high-ups weren’t in the loop
(Or if in point of fact were then).
The rest of us were surely not.
As campaigns raged, we knew not squat.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Those Few

A memo to admissions deans:
If you recruit a quarterback
Who’s short of smarts as well as means,
Admit, please, vets, home from Iraq
And combat in Afghanistan
With brains, though reeling still from fright,
Yet bound to be all that they can,
Rejoicing when they sleep at night.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Well Worth The Wait

At polls the exclamation point
Was those in line disposed to wait
Though sure the networks would anoint
Barack as winner of their state.
They knew, suppressed, but still enrolled,
Revenge is best when served up cold.

Sunday, November 4, 2012

A Newer Deal

As we get set to pull our troops
A decade in Afghanistan
As from Iraq where they’d been dupes
For Bush’s futile battle plan
In search of fancied weaponry,
I offer what might first sound daft
To caustic peaceniks such as me:
Agree to reinstate the draft.

Friday, November 2, 2012

More Is On The Way

Our country’s most horrific storm
Should give the harshest skeptics pause
For thought about when oceans warm
And climatologists have cause
To say almost beyond a doubt
It gave bitch Sandy massive clout.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Get a Choice!

The time has come to trash pro-life
As though it contradicts pro-choice.
In fact the pious term is rife
With threat to still a woman’s voice.
When health of mom and babe collide.
Abortion though’s not homicide.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Passing the Bucks

For those who like a slugfest brawl
I guess that Tuesday night’s debate
Was best of those to yet befall
Contenders prone to underrate
Specifics on the deficits—
Barack’s restraint as well as Mitt‘s.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

21st Century Malala

She’s done what U.S. drones cannot,
And what most Pakistanis won’t,
By standing tall and getting shot
Because she snubbed some ancient don’t
Misstated as Islamic rule
That females shouldn’t go to school.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Biden for President

Since video’s replacing print
As our most widespread medium
And how you smile and how you squint,
(Albeit both grow tiresome)
In public life can dominate,
Paul Ryan learned so in debate.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

No BS from the BLS

Republicans seem sad to see
The jobless going back to work.
While others whoop, the GOP
Portrays an upward trend a quirk,
As though misfortune somehow struck
And hiring was their back luck.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Angels are in the Details

Don’t think of sacking Big Bird, Mitt,
By getting rid of PBS.
He teaches math, which should befit
A candidate whose own’s a mess
And needs help with arithmetic
Unless, forbid, you’re trying to trick.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Say Cheese (or Queso)

A punishment without a crime
Like recent photo ID laws
That states have passed without a climb
In voter fraud enough to cause
Solutions where no problems lurked
Should go, or be at least reworked.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Can't Read Mitt's Lips

It’s obvious why Mitt’s obscure
About his plans as president.
It’s not as though he isn't sure.
Instead he has to circumvent
Specifics his own folks eschew
Like where to find more revenue.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Call an Ambulance

I now watch Mitt with squinted eyes
Through fingers pressed obstructing sight
As though he needs to improvise
Because he’s lost and can’t recite
Lines called for in a third-grade play,
To friends’ and family’s taut dismay.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Arab Summer

The best news from a Muslim land
Since crowds declared their Arab Spring
Is how much Libyans understand
The means the Western world can bring
To see their country modernize,
And cut militias down to size.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Is Mitt a Masochist?

Since you don’t pay an income tax,
You count upon the government,
As victims, dubbed, to watch your backs
With health care, food—you name it—rent,
Or loans to get B.A. degrees
And kindle possibilities.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest

The world has plumbed a brand new low.
A California fraudster shoots
An idiotic video
That shows Mohammed at his roots
To be a clownish pedophile
And prophet only in denial.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Some of Your Worst Enemies are Jews

Should Israel bombard Iran
To decimate enrichment plants
That, even though denials, can
Create the chilling circumstance
Where mullahs have atomic bombs
To lob at rabbis singing psalms?

Monday, September 3, 2012

As Also the World Watches

Such matters might seem frivolous
Amid a presidential race
What counts, though, for this grumpy gus
Is whether candidates debase
Avoidably not just their foes
But, too, themselves, in fabled prose.

Friday, August 31, 2012

Dirty Clint

We now know Mitt in private life
Has been a lovey-dovey dad
And there when needed for his wife
And grandkids more than most have had
And fervent member of his church.
He’d never leave you in the lurch.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

No-Class Warfare

Mitt Romney’s latest lie deluxe
Is claiming that Obamacare
Would drain three-quarter trillion bucks
(Or so) from Medicare—though where?
Not benefits as he attests
But wellness givers’ treasure chests.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Matthew 25:31-46

As Gulf storm Isaac northward veers
Toward flood-prone shores of Tampa Bay
And GOP conventioneers,
They might think twice when time to pray
For death to programs deemed a threat
That form our social safety net.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Keep On Keeping On!

He stated justifiable,
Implying some rapes are okay?
I think that certifiable
Is what Todd Akin meant to say.
Still, reprimands proliferate
From even his own party’s slate.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Sex and the Cosmo Girl

To say the king’s not wearing clothes
Means someone’s dodged the obvious,
To say the queen dispatches those
At moments that we won’t discuss
Is Helen Gurley Brown’s bequest
That traded prudery for zest.

Friday, August 17, 2012

Our Home-Grown Pioneers

Stay-out-of-jail cards aren’t as good
As green cards for tomorrow’s Yanks.
Those issued, though, this summer should
Prompt young undocumenteds’ thanks.
If here since kids, they’re free to roam
For two years as though right at home.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Beware of Women

If you’re of child-bearing age
The odds are huge that you or he
Use contraception at some stage
No matter what your faith might be.
That’s what much hush-hush polling shows
How we have fun without our clothes.

Monday, August 13, 2012

Beware of Geezers

Four years ago Obama won
In large part thanks to youngsters’ votes.
This year he’ll win when seniors shun
The GOP, whose slate promotes
Dismantling of Medicare,
A view not going anywhere.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

That Which is Worse than Lying

I’d rather have a president
Who’s bright enough to not get caught
When lying as to what laws meant
And waivers even he had sought
While governor with oversight
To make sure welfare-work went right.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Goodbye Sleet, Hello Click

The Postal Service, what’s its need
In times when movement of its mail
Is correlated with the speed
Of something plodding as a snail
By those who’ve never bought a stamp,
Whose emails messaging revamp?

Monday, July 30, 2012

Jim Crow Redux

As they’re a cure with no disease,
Those voter photo-ID laws,
A brainstorm of the GOP’s
To thwart Latinos without cause
From casting ballots as allowed,
Republicans should hold heads bowed.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Twist and Shout

I can’t believe the blatancy
With which it twists Obama’s words.
According to the GOP,
Which for the campaign homestretch girds
“You didn’t build that” meant he slurred
Small-business founders. How absurd!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Lurking in the Coal Mine

The record heat, the record drought,
The drenching storms, the higher seas
Are on the rise beyond a doubt,
Stark matters strictly of degrees.
Schlemiels who question climate change,
Its fallout seems to more derange.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

The NRA’s Horrora

The NRA Museum would
I gather bow to members’ taste
And—not to be misunderstood
As bloodbath licensers disgraced—
Put on display a plaster head
Of each one of Aurora’s dead.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Down With Joe

I don’t know why we argue so
About an NCAA choice
To punish Penn State yes or no
For giving decency a voice
By shutting football down this fall
For boys once in Sandusky’s thrall.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Keep It Up, Kim!

Kim Jong Un, latest familycrat
To foist an ironclad diktat
On North Korea’s populace
(For years bereft beneath the bus)
Might just be mellowing a tad
According to a recent fad:
In place of women’s uniforms
High heels and miniskirts are norms.
And bringing down a concert house,
Is new director, Mickey Mouse.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Pants Ablaze?

You likely showed a creditor
Back tax returns to get a loan.
As to how many years before?
They stay within the comfort zone
Of, no doubt, who would take the chance—
Or not—of whether to finance.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Allons Enfants de la Patrie

The French are difficult to love.
They often act, as though above,
Their provenance was foreordained
To guarantee that, though disdained,
The rest of us were civilized
Enough, at least, to be apprised
Of how to speak and eat and paint,
And copulate without restraint.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Spend! Spend! Spend!

Obama in his TV speech
On whether all need tax relief
Induced the GOP’s stock screech
By challenging its fixed belief.
He called for hikes on those who clear
A quarter million bucks a year.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

How Did We Get Here?

This won’t be long, I guarantee.
Subparticles are not my strength,
One named for God especially,
(A daunting task at any length)
And recognized, in language terse,
For mass we call the universe.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Brave Beginnings

All men, the Founding Fathers said,
Are equal, though they thought that some
Were less so—chattel slaves instead.
To make them not so, men kept mum.

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Who Counts?

I don’t know why the N.R.A.
Found fault with Fast and Furious
And through elected pawns makes hay
Of what strikes me as spurious:
Concern for turning weapons loose
That vanished in a roundup ruse.

Friday, June 29, 2012

Death or Taxes

Chief Justice Roberts (who’d have thought?)
Of sturdy right-of-center views,
The choice of whom Obama fought
While senator, which should amuse
Someone whose crowning White House coup
Is health reform for all of you.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Who Wants to Do the Work?

I’m glad the High Court overturned
Three-fourths of Arizona’s law
That Constitution buffs discerned
As giving states the right to draw
Exclusive foreign policies
On immigration deportees.

Monday, June 25, 2012

The Price is Wrong

As though he were our High Court’s voice
When dubbing corporations folks,
Mitt Romney more so can rejoice
At how they merit equal strokes.
Five justices have ruled (past reach),
Firms' boundless campaign dole’s free speech.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Call Them By Another Name

By now we’ve all viewed Karen Klein,
The aging, school-bus monitor
Tormented by a group malign
Of seventh-graders to abhor,
Recalling while she’s teary-eyed
Her eldest son’s a suicide.

Friday, June 22, 2012

Kids Should be Kids (Part Two)

Imagine that he’d never been
Sandusky, the defensive coach,
But janitor, who now and then
In boys-room showers might approach
With purposes no more complex
Than soapy, anal, oral sex.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Kids Should be Kids

I wonder what the Russians think
When viewing tortured Syrian tots.
Or if the Chinese ever blink
At mutilated babes on cots.
Iranians, wince when they glance
At dead kids in the ambulance?

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Eurowoes

The European Union’s states
Think someday that they might unite
In such a way that re-creates
The government that we’ve found right:
Including common currency—
A basic problem, I foresee.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Getting What We'll Pay For

Wisconsin’s vote to sap the might
Of public-service employees,
By cutting benefits and right
To barter wages, guarantees
A budget surplus but as well,
A risky kind of personnel.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Pssst! Wanna Shot of Pepsi?

New York’s Mayor Bloomberg wants to shrink
The bottle size of cokes folks drink
At shows, in bistros and the street,
Since such caloric swill’s so sweet,
And three in ten of us, obese,
But will the incidence decrease?

Monday, June 4, 2012

A Diamond of a Queen

There’s much Elizabeth’s been through
Both as a princess and a queen.
In London during World War II,
(Although her land’s most privileged teen}
While horses wished she’d rather prance,
She drove an army ambulance.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Running on Bounty

John Edwards’ fate, no matter what,
Would serve him right for all his wrong.
A pretty boy must watch his butt
Both in the yard and all night long.
If not in prison, dirty looks
From all who loathe acquitted crooks.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Their Wish

Today’s a day for lay-aways,
For storewide deals, no money down.
But unbecoming trade betrays
Our fallen’s day of earned renown.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Wall Street's Dislike Button

I delegate to broker Charles
All choices for securities.
No need to manufacture quarrels
About what I deem mysteries,
Including Facebook’s IPO.
About which this I’d like to know:

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Nanoseconds of Civility

He rushed into a burning house
To save a neighbor close death.
Before his firemen could douse,
Mayor Booker feared his final breath
Would come inside a flaming room,
His generosity his doom.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Only in New York

Khalid Shaikh Mohammed scares me
Not for razing our Twin Towers.
Nevermore the bastard goes free,
Locked up till his final hours
In Guantánamo? Or elsewhere?
Does it matter? Finally, I care.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Marriage Bans

Same-sex marriage? Don’t be jocund,
Who’s the wife and who’s the husband?
Marriage of the different sexes?
More it lasts, the more it vexes.
Half end up in front of judges,
Drained of love and full of grudges.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

You Tell Her, Bill

I disagree with John McCain
 On most stuff, though I like him heaps.
 I love his nearly lone campaign
 That gives my liberal friends the creeps
 To rid the Syrians of their fright
 By lending military might.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

It's the Truth, Stupid

Among us who cannot forget
Our rowdy pranks from years ago?
The answer’s nearly all, I bet,
Although we’d just as soon forgo
Reminders of what brats we were,
And leave such larks at most a blur.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Cyber Grads

If tony universities
Rejected you and still you smart,
Some campus news the pain might ease
And give your hopes an odd fresh start:
You’re good to go to M.I.T.
As well as Harvard, all for free.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Where There's Bud There's Death

Our native tribesmen can’t hold booze
As try we do (though far from all).
Metabolism they don’t choose—
Absorbing poorly alcohol—
Their Asian forebears brought as trait
Across an ice-jammed Bering Strait.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

A Matter of Habit

They heal the sick, they've taught the kids
Like (my fault, Sister, such as) I.
(Good syntax, we know—ow!—forbids,
Unless—OW!!—where, when, how, or why
Like—preposition—indicates.
Plus—ARGGH!!!-—I should have written me
As teach, verb transitive, dictates.
Now won’t you let your straightedge be?)

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Joel's N-Goal

Black guys dunk against the Celtics,
Hit home runs against the Red Sox,
Now and then thwart extra-point kicks
When some Patriots neglect blocks
All of which annoys a Southie,
Recognized for being mouthy.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Cracks in China

Beijing’s one-China policy
Has gone kablooey from within.
The Politburo should foresee
Taiwan forever as a twin
And on the mainland, two regimes:
Its own and one where money teems.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Climate Stability?

I’m scared of what might be in store
When larger polar icebergs calve
From Greenland or Antarctic’s shore.
Much higher sea tides than we have?
(An added ice cube in my drink
Can raise it finally past the brink!)

He Rocked

We honor Martin Luther King,
A martyr to the nation’s cause
Of reinterpreting right thing
To mean more than the country’s laws,
Which sometimes ruled we couldn't wed
If offspring were to be crossbred.

Monday, April 16, 2012

For This We Pay Taxes?

In Washington, House hearings start
This week into the GSA,
The agency that, off the chart,
800 grand-plus threw away
In Vegas on some managers
Unconscious of parameters.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Did You Hear That, First Darling?

Twelve Secret Service agents sent
Beforehand to Colombia
To gear up for the president
Were brought home for a dumb idea:
Inviting back to their hotel
Some prostitutas straight from hell.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Mike Wallace 1918-2012

He came along at just the time
That TV news first challenged print.
From there his celebrated climb
To 60 Minutes’ boisterous stint
Where nearly forty years aligned
A newsman with a showman’s mind.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Shake it Up, Mitty, Twist and Turn

Mitt Romney hires forthright guys,
Not lackeys just to run and fetch.
The one demonstrably most wise
Said candidates will Etch a Sketch
Until their primary’s been won,
Then shake the box till all’s undone.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

God Bless EVERYONE

It‘s fitting Easter/Passover
Should summon legends of rebirth,
As both the Testaments aver
That it and flight from Egypt’s earth
Saved Jews and Christians. Would both are
This year in Buddhist Myanmar.

Monday, April 2, 2012

PG-13? R? WTF?

The Hunger Games’ PG-13
Seems curious amid the fuss
About what’s fitting for a teen
Like Bully and the f-word cuss,
Which drew an R initially.
It’s now unrated; all should see.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Taking Credit

If by the millions credit cards
 Are hacked, as brought to light last week,
Aren’t reassurances canards
And havoc what the bandits wreak,
As though pickpockets clogged the streets
And filched our funds as if free eats?

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Good Health to All

Some U.S. High Court Justices
Are sounding daft upon their perch,
Debating plus and minuses
Of health reform that leaves a smirch:
Is mandating a policy
Like obligating broccoli?

Monday, March 26, 2012

When the Saints go Marching Out

New Orleans Saints might be their name
And maybe those on offense were,
But those on defense, those to blame
For letting sport and maiming blur
By taking cash to mete out pain
Should get tossed in Lake Pontchartrain.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

There Shouldn't be a Law

What were law enforcers thinking
When they bought the watchman’s story?
Wasn’t something in it stinking?
Slender unarmed kid his quarry,
Shot to death with paid-for victuals,
Taking Dad, iced tea and Skittles?

Monday, March 19, 2012

Beyond the Limit

A car’s backfire gives me pause
While trying hard to catch my breath,
Though in a trice I know the cause
Should not instill a fear of death.
Not so for those in combat posts
Who’ve heard the sound turn friends to ghosts.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Six Million Counterarguments

Holier than any of us,
Rick Santorum, on the surface,
Stumps the states as if he wants to
Swell his Bible base to Jews who
Share an ideology that’s
Doomed to make Obama’s ersatz.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

A Knick in Armor

He’s not a new phenomenon.
Old-fashioned, I would sooner say.
It’s teamwork he depends upon,
First thing, he looks to make a play,
Though drives and scores if left alone
Or swishes from the three-point zone.

Monday, February 20, 2012

Didn't She Almost Have it All

Although a medicine’s prescribed,
And not a drug dealt on the street,
It could be less safe if imbibed
By patients who their health mistreat
By taking it with alcohol,
Indifferent to what might befall.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Closing the Book on Camelot

The first time old enough to vote
I proudly checked off JFK,
Perhaps for his torpedo boat,
Though hero worship soon gave way
To awe for sending men in space
And slowing down the weapons race.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

They Smile in Your Face

Who could have thought the GOP,
The party of the super-rich,
Would find its likely nominee
Besieged by wannnabes who bitch
How Romney laid off working stiffs.
It’s brought about ironic tiffs.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Pissing All Over Themselves

It’s hard for me to criticize
Our youthful proxies in a hell
That I can only theorize:
A nightmare to a fare-thee-well,
A breakdown of humanity
That risks a loss of sanity.

I Too Have a Dream

When Martin Luther King was shot
The Negroes, as they went by then—
More often disapproved than not—
Might question if they’d thrive and when.
Their men if, irritated, flinched
Still ran a risk of getting lynched.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

To Hell with Them

Mocked you might have, Tebow’s kneeldowns
Thanking God for Denver touchtowns.
Sunday, though, you might have wondered:
Had I in my doubting blundered?
Overtime’s first play, he passes
Fifty yards before stunned masses.
Wide receiver Thomas runs it
In to win, as though by His Writ.
Underdogs, no matter who scoffs,
Cast out Pittsburgh from the playoffs.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Already All But Over

Election year 2012
I’d hoped would offer more suspense:
At minimum till springtime shelve
The choice of candidate who’d thence
The colors of the GOP
Advance as party nominee.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Read Zilch About It!!

I used to sort of like Ron Paul
I, too, think government’s immense:
Too many workers overall
Though wider service makes more sense
Ensuring citizens feel key,
In good health and financially.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Down the Goldbrick Road?

Two thousand aught eleven’s gone,
And still the country ought to sweat.
We could have seen a dark new dawn:
Default upon our national debt
And credit rating triple Z
For playing chicken in D.C.