If tony universities
Rejected you and still you smart,
Some campus news the pain might ease
And give your hopes an odd fresh start:
You’re good to go to M.I.T.
As well as Harvard, all for free.
Like Stanford, Princeton, UMich, Penn,
They’ll let you hit the books online,
And at your pace wherever, when,
You choose their homework to assign.
And if by chance you sleep in class
You’re free to give yourself a pass.
The interactive learning tools
Include discussions, quizzes, labs,
And also unlike normal schools,
Instructor-student vid confabs.
No credits, though certificates,
Which might show just as well one’s wits.
Diplomas on a business wall
Aren’t what this country’s commerce made.
It’s workplace skills that stood us tall
In global and domestic trade.
Prestigious educators, thanks!
You’ll keep us in exalted ranks.
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