Watch Yourself!

Julian Assange, Wickileaker,
Bent on spilling U.S. secrets.
Truth he claims to be a seeker
Though it means more U.S. caskets
Shipped from far-flung mountain battle,
Full disclosure’s price to tattle.

Gathering

Thanksgiving starts my every day;
I’m grateful for the glow of dawn.
From nothingness I’ve one more stay
Before my time on Earth is gone
To dwell upon our mystery
That won’t explain our history.

Keep On Chillin', Papa!

Pope Benedict at last allows
That condoms have a needed use—
Just one, but ample to arouse
Conjecture that maybe he’ll loose
Twin rules for spousal dalliance:
Fidelity and abstinence.

The Letter and The Spirit

In recent years the IRS
Has been a much more friendly place.
Although it still can dispossess,
It does so at a slower pace.
Before it raids your bank account,
It tells you first the owed amount.

Plan XXX

What’s your preference, scan or pat-down,
By new touchy-feely screeners?
Sister Regis used her worst frown
When we joked about our wieners,
Now called junk, which men don’t like stroked.
Women, neither, like their breasts poked.

We Owe It To Ourselves

It’s bad enough when MasterCard
And Visa call, and then lament
That they must tell us we are barred
From borrowing another cent.

But what if China rings us and
Apologetically bemoans
That we at last must understand
It cannot make us further loans?