No-Men

Ahmadinejad wants a break
From all the gripes, for goodness’ sake.
Like Huey Long, who spread the wealth
To boost the economic health
With oil giants’ revenue
Throughout Louisiana, too,
Mahmoud controls largess to strut
As president, no matter what.

As Huey liked to tighten screws
On those who didn’t share his views,
Ahmandinejad’s harsh, good grief!
But unlike Long, he’s not the chief.
Like high school student government,
A principal he can’t confront
Can veto when they don't agree.
He’s Supreme Leader Khamenei.

In other words, theocracy
Can trump Iran’s democracy.
As though a U.S. cleric could
Undue what we had understood
Would be a bill signed into law
To have Pat Robertson withdraw.
Now think of how events can craze
Those marching in Tehran these days.

Imagine anti-hatred laws—
Repeatedly they give Pat pause—
That prompted days at Disneyland
When gays alone go hand in hand,
So much to Robertson’s distate.
He cauthioned that Orlando faced
Tornados, earthquakes, hurricanes,
For causing God unholy pains.

Or passing women’s equal rights,
Which stir, he said, domestic fights
And witchcraft and infanticide,
More lesbians to be decried.
These aren’t, I swear, from made-up notes.
They’re from his ten most stupid quotes.
And though his words don’t hold much sway,
Khamenei’s do, to my dismay.