Tony Weiner, New York’s crotch king,
Shouldn’t have to sound so bitter.
To be sure, the sort of ribbing,
Re: the bulging-undieTwitter,
Echoes taunts from boyhood playgrounds.
Why not change, then, how his name sounds?
Stated like the German sausage,
Wiener, as in yummy schnitzel,
Shaped like—well—it’s common knowledge,
Doesn’t have to prompt a chuckle,
E before i as in Weiner
Rhymes instead with words like miner.
Uh-oh. Wait one. Also whiner,
As in one who balks at questions.
Rather, dreaming how much finer
If some pundits shelve suggestions
That no more has he a prayer
Of becoming New York’s mayor.
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